I am trying to develop a class on Negotiations. I have seen that most classes in kink conventions center on particular forms of play rather than the necessary but possibly boring negotiations beforhand. But they are an absolute Necessity. This may seem repetitive and redundant. I tried to include …
I hope that what I am about to say here is totally unnecessary. I want to be clear here. I am not saying that there are not great personal rewards in knowing you have deeply pleased your partner. That, in itself can be a profound reward. But I also believe …
This is a follow-up to an earlier post, so do not think I am referring to commands given to someone who has given you authority. Nope. Tiz about Dinner. Oft it seems that The Book of BDSM says a Dominant must eventually order all meals for those in their charge, …
I have probably hit this subject many times before, but I was in an interesting discussion in a subreddit. It was involving the difficulties involved with punishing a masochist. I thought I would pass on some of the discussion here. “I am a strong sadist who enjoys a partner who …
I put “Me Too” in quotes only to convey that I have not been a victim of sexual abuse, not to belittle it’s intent in any way. My thoughts are still jumbled, but strong. This is a subject of overwhelming importance to me, to my family, to families with young …
In my first post on Exxxotica 2015 I mentioned the lovely Lilly, a beautiful young masochistic rigger, a possessor of the most astounding breasts and caring heart, who had just lost her Daddy. First I should say that she has found him again for which I am very glad. For a …
As most of you know, I am a new resident of the Austin area. (Whew, election day, very different from California.) I am reaching the end of a year long adventure with the Austin Mentor’s Program which has given me an opportunity to meet a large number of very experienced people, …
I often talk with people who identify as a submissive, and often they ask me if their Master has the right to do…well…whatever. My answer is always, “If you give them that right.” I fear, sometimes, that we on the Dominant side of the equation have worked very hard to …
This post comes from a discussion currently going on in a LinkedIn group to which I belong, Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality — SSSS. Yes, even considering my previous post, I do still read it. It began as a debate over a Psych Today article as to whether …
As many posts here have originated, this comes from a question I received on FetLife. I was asked to comment on pain by a woman seeking to find a deeper connection between eroticism and more severe forms of sensation. I am not sure what I can say that will be …
